What You Need To Know About Comparison
I think its human nature to compare ourselves to our surroundings. To look around and wonder “What If” I lived that life, drove that car, had those grades or reached that goal. Yet we fail to acknowledge that we each have something so unique and modern to offer. I know comparison is tricky, as much as we know we shouldn’t, we do it anyways. I am awfully guilty of this. Its almost automatic. But as soon as I do it, I have to remind myself all the reasons why its so wrong and invalid.
“Every minute you spend wishing you had someone else’s life is a minute spent wasting yours”
You are one, you will always be one and only. No one can or ever will be able to offer and give what you can. There’s no one that can think your thoughts. There is no one that can read the pages you’ve turned. No one that can experience the chapters you lived. There is no one that can speak your words. You have your very own story to tell. A story that should never be compared or competed with anyone else’s. And it would be awfully selfish, if you didn’t tell it.
You’re stealing from yourself
No literally. By wishing you has someone else _fill in the blank_you take away your own motivation, gifts and even joy.
After all, companion is the thief of joy.
While you’re sitting there comparing and contrasting, you take away the value and the appreciation of what you’re holding. If you get too caught up in comparison, you might lose your sense of motivation. And if you lose that, you will lose so much more. Therefore, don’t let yourself maintain such a deceiving habit.
Its not a fair act
We all express our art, talents and intelligence VERY differently.
Do you compare your favorite musicians to each other? What if they were to compare themselves to each other? Or what If in their amateur days they were to compare their music to already well-known artist? It would probably create a great deal of discouragement. Simply because it’s impossible to compare something so distinct and independent. Its not equitable and its not valid. So do yourself a favor and save yourself from an illusion of a trap most of us fall in. How can others acclaim your capability when you cant even appreciate your own?
Don’t fail to recognize your own art while getting lost in someone else’s.
which leads me to…
Don’t ignore your own qualities
Recognize your own talents. What do people most compliment you in? What activities do you get the most joy out of? Don’t ignore this. You have your own aptitudes that others want to know more about. So, let them.
“ Admire someone else’s beauty without questioning your own”
People are drawn to novelty- YOU are novelty
You are like nothing anyone has ever seen before. People are drawn to novelty; the new and the unknown. You are a mystery to anyone else. Therefore you will be wasting your time looking to be anything mundane.
You shut down your ability to create
You were created to create- draw from the unknown and give it meaning. You will create content no one else will. Whatever you choose- music, academia, art ,dance, writing, photography or business. Anything you have a love for, will grow if you allow it to.
So when you try to stay in what you believe to be the “safe zone.” Which is where anything you create is based on something that already exists or remains familiar, maybe because you know others have previously been drawn to it. Yet this is were you go very wrong. You see, people have already seen it, been there and done that. They don’t want the same thing all over again. People want something that has not yet been offered to the world. That’s where you step in.
Allow yourself to gain inspiration from the differences
This means be aware of what you want to be better at, work on or change within yourself. Im going to contradict myself here but; if youre going to compare, let the comparison inspire you. This requires a lot of conscious effort. The moment you compare yourself your automatic system instantly triggers a lot of negative thoughts and feelings. Which is why its critical to make a cognitive effort to switch those thoughts into an open door to self-improvements.